What to do if you see Cher in your eggs
Once again, the impact on our society from iconic images being found on various forms of edible goods has reared it's ugly head.
But this time it’s for a good cause, so I’m OK with it.
I wrote about a woman several years ago who made a grilled cheese sandwich on some sandwich grilling device, and after she had taken a couple bites inspected it closer and found what she believed was the unmistakable image of the Virgin Mary in the toasting pattern.
She then did what any other rational human being would do. She ate it.
Not really, she put it in some hermetically sealed container thingie, listed it on ebay and sold it for an amount of money that would purchase me a Lexus.
Which means somebody out there has a half-eaten grilled cheese sandwich with a toasted imprint of a very surprised Virgin Mary on it. And I still have no Lexus.
I think this event may have precipitated the "Hello Kitty" sandwich toaster I saw at Target. Apparently the "Hello Virgin Mary" version did not impress the focus groups as much as a kitten with a hair bow.
This week I read a story on The Daily Beast that’s almost as tasty.
According to the story a Nebraska woman, after spending 99-cents on some Chicken McNuggets at McDonalds three years ago (you read that right), she noticed one of her nuggets of chicken goodness resembled George Washington, the first and only president of the United States who didn’t lie.
For reasons only known to herself and the psychic hotline, she put the George Washington McNugget in the freezer, until this year.
Then, trying to raise money for her church’s summer camp, she dug the presidential nugget out of her freezer and did what any red-blooded American would do: she posted it on eBay.
When she first posted it, eBay removed the nugget, citing rules regulating expired food (but it was frozen?!?!), but then notified the woman that it was “willing to make exceptions to help her cause,” and reposted the item.
The winning bid: $8,100.
Or as I like to call it, a down payment on a Lexus.
This is not a rare phenomenon, as one time I thought I could see Robert Plant's likeness on a homemade fried pie I got at City Cafe. But I put my glasses on, and found out it was only Justin Bieber.
So, I ate it.
It is not lost on me that I don’t have an enterprising brain, having eaten a potentially valuable Justin Bieber fried pie and all, which could have raised money for the IPHS Scholarship Fund, the local Food Pantry, or a new Lexus.
In the future I won’t make that mistake again.
Email me your pictures of food you believe resembles somebody we all know – it can’t be your grandmother or your boss, or even your dog – and I will post them on my website, www.kari lynncollins com.
Email your entry to kcollins@ iowaparkleader.com with a little history of the food item, and a description please. The winner will be announced at the first of April.