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Bo(sto)n Voyage, Robert Tom
078/02/12
Sandwiched in between my writing this, and you reading this, is me taking my son to the Oklahoma City airport so he can start a new and wonderful chapter in his life.

... CLICK TO READ

Spamtastic news, ya'll !!!
07/05/12
News flash, folks: You can buy Spam at a restaurant in Iowa Park, Texas.
You can thank me later for telling you.

... CLICK TO READ

The "Great Crawdad Massacre of 1976"
06/14/12
The year was 1976, the same year our great country celebrated 200 years of freedom from the British. It was also the year I imprisoned and accidentally killed a couple hundred crawdads, thus freeing them from living in mud and smelling bad.

... CLICK TO READ

Service with a smirk, umm, make that a smile
05/10/12
A nice, hot bath will fix anything, except for maybe my pride.

... CLICK TO READ

I applied myself, just not in band
05/03/12

If anything defines the pinnacle of my mother's disappointment in me, it would be this: I quit band after my freshman year in high school.
And my mother is not over it yet.

... CLICK TO READ

And I'm taking my Etch-a-Sketch with me
04/05/12
Two weeks from now I’ll be in Dayton, Ohio,honing my writing skills which hopefully will allow me to get better at entertaining you.

... CLICK TO READ

What to do if you see Cher in your eggs
03/08/12
Once again, the impact on our society from iconic images being found on various forms of edible goods has reared it's ugly head.

... CLICK TO READ

My birthday resolutions are rapidly expanding
01/26/12
I had some lofty goals going into my birthday this year.
I start my new year on my birthday each year because it gives me three weeks beyond everyone else to wrap my brain around these lofty goals; and it feeds the procrastination that I’ve been unable to beat with past resolutions.

... CLICK TO READ

Ain't no mountain high enough;
ain't no bathroom boy enough
01/19/12
Tuesday was a banner day for me for a couple of reasons.
One, I am one step closer to standing atop the summit of Mount Trashmore. Mount Trashmore is located here in sometimes sunny Iowa Park, but for all the luck I’ve had getting to the top of it, it just as well be in a remote island in the Pacific.
And two, I got to read the Leader in a men’s restroom.

... CLICK TO READ

Head 'em up, move 'em out
01/05/12
I have been married for six months this week.
Bobby and I are at an age that doesn’t demand a celebration of incremental milestones. In fact, when I said "happy six-month anniversary" to Bobby, he said, "I'm not supposed to buy you anything for this one, am I?"
I haven't given him an answer yet, because I believe it's good to keep mystery in a relationship.

... CLICK TO READ

2011 was more than I deserved
12/29/11
I definitely had a better Christmas than I deserved, but I am not giving it back.
For starters, a week before Christmas my son, Tom, graduated from Texas Tech with a degree in English. It made me proud to see him reach that goal while working a lot of hours at Rudy’s Barbecue.
So Guns Up!, Merry Christmas and Happy Birthday to him, me and every member of the village who helped.

... CLICK TO READ

Escaping reality with reality – keeping TV real
12/08/11
I had a thought a couple of days ago that was so profound, I now believe I probably heard it somewhere else a long time ago and it’s just now resurfacing.
And the thought is this: People use TV to escape reality. But what’s on TV is mostly reality shows, which makes no sense.

... CLICK TO READ

Earthquakes, tornadoes and turnpikes, oh my!
by Kari Collins (11/10/11)
I should have been scared. Really I should have, but I wasn’t. Me and Lydia giggled like 13 year olds about how we had just experienced our first earthquake, and immediately began texting.
... CLICK TO READ

Barbie visits a tattoo parlor
by Kari Collins (10/20/11)
Mattel unveiled their new Barbie® Totally Stylin’ Tattoos™ doll recently, and ever since I heard of it, have struggled to come to terms with whether it’s the best idea since candy cigarettes.
... CLICK TO READ

If men are from mars,
women are from the North Pole
by Kari Collins (10/13/11)
I love all things Christmas – with the absolute exception of fruitcake, coconut balls and mechanical Santas that scare the crap out of me at Wal-Mart – and shouldn’t be surprised that a sound 91 percent of the men I know could live happy, full and productive lives without celebrating Christmas for a full month.
... CLICK TO READ

Puppies of mass destruction
by Kari Collins (09/08/11)
Bobby and I added to our family two weeks ago, because it turns out we like to ask each other, “What were we thinking?” every two or so hours.
... CLICK TO READ

Buffet of pain
by Kari Collins (08/18/11)
My efforts to lose 15 pounds has led me to the biggest buffet I have ever been to – the exercise class buffet at the YMCA.
... CLICK TO READ

Contents of this purse
may be larger than they appear
by Kari Collins (06/09/11)
Purses are a many splendored thing. Mysterious. Useful. Donkey-like. A woman’s ultimate security blanket.
And if they are a mirror to our soul, I am in deep trouble.

... CLICK TO READ

Housewives of Beverly Hillbillies
by Kari Collins(01/13/11)
Recently I began watching Housewives of Beverly Hills, a TV reality show depicting the trials and tribulations of the aforementioned title.
It turns out the show is a metaphoric train wreck that I can’t stop watching, so my DVR is set to record it in case I’m busy doing something productive like grocery shopping or saving a life.

... CLICK TO READ

For those of you in the hard of hearing section
by Kari Collins(07/30/09)
"They were letting it all hang out... had the groovy arms going, pops was doing what I call the modified Brady Bunch-train dance step all over the place, the whole nine yards. I thought to myself, “My God, the old people tonight, they are a-dancin’.”
... CLICK TO READ

They already had my divided attention
by Kari Collins(06/18/09)
"I used  to be on a compulsory tour to meet every trooper in this great state. But since the last time I saw the light - the one in my rearview mirror – I have been on the straight and narrow, road-wise. For the most part.”
... CLICK TO READ

Litigation: It's not just for breakfast anymore
by Kari Collins(06/11/09)
"I love a good lawsuit story, and to be honest the one I’m about to tell you is among the best I’ve seen to date.”
... CLICK TO READ

Excuses, excuses
by Kari Collins(04/16/09)
"Every day I arrive at work between 8:45 and 9:30. . . a.m. After I put my belongings in my work area, I mumble the day’s excuse while I’m heading out the door to City Cafe for one last jolt of caffeine before the work day begins.”
... CLICK TO READ

Reunion with a very bad day
by Kevin Hamilton (04/09/09)
"All during that April day in 1979 I felt like something was going down. The way the moisture clouds worked themselves to the northeast, the initial calls of a tornado hitting Vernon, then Seymour..."
... CLICK TO READ

Love is in the snare
by Kari Collins(02/12/09)
"And despite the fact that 86 to 100 percent of all men (depending on where their wives are standing) will tell you that it is a fabricated holiday specifically designed to screw them over, I have delved deeply into the human psyche to understand the wide valley of that seems to exist between the thought processes of the sexes.”
... CLICK TO READ

Hawk Ridge and a solution
by Kevin Hamilton (02/12/09)
"You could tell how helpful the City of Wichita Falls was going to be on the subject as Bolin said, “Unfortunately, the reality is that if this problem had been detected earlier, it might have meant an earlier ending for Hawk Ridge ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Hard to trust when no one is verifying
by Kari Collins(01/22/09)
"I almost blew coffee out of my nose when Tom Brokaw described the dress that Michelle Obama wore to the church service as “yellow brocade.”
... CLICK TO READ

Clean cars, clear conscience, collateral damage
by Kevin Hamilton (01/22/09)
"I knew before I even bought it that keeping a black car clean would be tricky, and time consuming ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Keeping your colon skinny
no easy feat during the holidays
by Kari Collins(12/11/08)
"With only two weeks left until Christmas and six months until swimsuit season, it is now my hope that someone invents chocolate-flavored carrot sticks which will cure a potentially fat colon ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Taking risks on Black Friday
by Kari Collins(11/27/08)
"Much like a person with advanced dementia, I will revisit sites of carnage from years gone by, and I will be griping about it before I even get out of bed ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Turkey, past and present
by Kevin Hamilton (09/18/08)
"Something about cooking that dinner on an O’Keefe-Merrick stove, 50s vintage, that made the meal even tastier. Though even now, each time I bite into the dressing and giblet gravy cooked from a modern kitchen by Mom, flashes of childhood fill my head, with the same smells, the same tastes, and the same sense of safe ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Sooner than later, Tech will win
by Kari Collins and Kevin Hamilton (11/20 /08)
"First a joke. What’s the difference between a UT fan and a puppy? Eventually the puppy grows up and quits whining ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Horns down, Guns up;
the stuff family fights are made of
by Kari Collins(11/06/08)
"During breaks I would glide through the living room, asking Kevin and Steve if they needed anything - like a touchdown, perhaps? ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Hillary's ankles, move over. Sarah got toasted
by Kari Collins(09/25/08)
"Four hours of toasting bread and carefully examining both sides rendered me the entire cast of The Brady Bunch, including Sam the Butcher, Fabio, the little girl the Chinese government felt was too ugly to sing in the opening ceremonies of the Olympics, Hillary Clinton’s ankles and Lassie looking for Timmy in the well ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Is the nation's economy really "ok"?
by Kevin Hamilton (09/18/08)
"As is reality, with the government footing much of the bill for these outrageously-incompetent acts of big business, we the taxpayers will accept the burden...."
... CLICK TO READ

Kari and Kevin discuss badminton
by Kari Collins and Kevin Hamilton (09/11/08)
"While I never actually got ill, I watched enough to know that the athletes have to be completely devoid of a self-image to wear that outfit while being watched by tens of hundreds of people across the globe ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Growing up with a linguistic expert,
who couldn't spell
by Kari Collins(08/28/08)
"By Monday evening, I realized that the word had sunk into the depths of my brain much like when you hear somebody hum the first few bars of “Take Me Out To the Ballgame,” which causes you to sing it in your head for days ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Things are getting busy, and I'm happy
by Kevin Hamilton (07/24/08)
"I’ve told both of them often enough that all I wanted was for them to be honest, truthful, humble, plus gainfully employed.
And happy...
"
... CLICK TO READ

Around the animal world with Kari and Kevin
08/21/08
"I feel qualified to discuss this because I own a cat and have part interest in two dogs, and I’ve spent an obscene amount of time researching animal news around the world when I was supposed to be working..."
... CLICK TO READ

Do NOT panic. Rain isn't even in the forecast
by Kari Collins(07/24/08)
"I assured her I had only panicked once at the sight of an umbrella-carrying pedestrian, and only because it was a very ugly umbrella, and it didn’t cause a wreck ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Drill, drill, drill before it's gone, gone, gone
by Kevin Hamilton (07/24/08)
"The current crisis at the gas pumps didn’t happen overnight, and isn’t the responsibility of one specific political party or president..."
... CLICK TO READ

Money can't buy taste
by Kari Collins(01/024)
"We only visited two of the seven floors, each of which were sparsely decorated using the “less is more” theme. But when you sell a pair of britches for $2,000, inventory is not an issue ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Creating a 'responsible' oasis
by Kevin Hamilton(01/24)
"The premise that Iowa Park remaining dry will keep our city and its citizens from experiencing problems of alcohol abuse is just bull hockey ...."
... CLICK TO READ

EDITORIAL
What avenue for battling drugs
is best for Iowa Park?
What began years ago as the ‘North Texas Regional Drug Enforcement Task Force’ involving several counties in the Red River Valley has since whittled down to one county and fewer strategic minds involved in making the process viable as a drug interdiction/rehabilitation tool for the citizens of Wichita County ...
FULL STORY

No resolutions? No problem! No guilt.
by Kari Collins(01/03)
"This is going to be my year of the anti-resolution. I decided I wasn’t going to make any resolutions, because every year I vow to do the same things I swore I’d do the year before - but didn’t ..."
... CLICK TO READ

The best way to start 2008
by Kevin Hamilton(01/03)
"Yes I did go to a New Year’s party Monday night. Believe it or not, I also got some sleep, woke up before the first sunrise of 2008, and went out to shoot pictures ...."
... CLICK TO READ

Snow good, ice bad
by Kevin Hamilton(12/13)
"...Mother Nature never tires of playing games with the earth’s population, and most of Oklahoma. When you get warm moist air moving over cold polar air, that’s when it gets really interesting ...."
... CLICK TO READ

LETTER TO TO THE EDITOR
Supports hospice ... CLICK TO READ

Gettin' your guns up,
and other things to lay odds on
by Kari Collins(11/29)
"What were the odds that Texas Tech would beat OU, knocking them out of the national championship? Get yer guns up ..."
... CLICK TO READ

Snow way: winter is here
by Kevin Hamilton(11/29)
"...I love snow. And Iowa Park was bombared with huge globs of the white stuff as darkness fell Sunday night. ...."
... CLICK TO READ

LETTERS TO TO THE EDITOR
National Hospice and
Palliative Care Month (11/29) ... CLICK TO READ
Name Withheld by Request (11/29) ... CLICK TO READ

Thanks to be giving
by Kevin Hamilton(11/22)
... CLICK TO READ

SPAM, the way I don't like it
by Kari Collins(11/15)
... CLICK TO READ

Thank you, Kelsey Johnson
by Kevin Hamilton (11/15)
... CLICK TO READ

My luge dream is big and coming true
by Kari Collins(11/08)
... CLICK TO READ

Used cars and the price of oil
by Kevin Hamilton(11/01)
... CLICK TO READ

Iowa Park has hit the big time
by Kari Collins(10/25)
... CLICK TO READ

Let's be proactive about staph
before the scary stuff shows up

by Kevin Hamilton(10/18)
... CLICK TO READ

Come to think of it, I've never
been a great driver

by Kari Collins(10/18)
... CLICK TO READ

Fear and loathing on the American highway
by Kevin Hamilton(10/04)
... CLICK TO READ

Does this outfit make my ankles look fat?
by Kari Collins (9/20)
... CLICK TO READ

It was good to see you
by Kevin Hamilton(9/20)
... CLICK TO READ

Spam I am not
by Kari Collins (9/06)
... CLICK TO READ

A pause to say "thank you"
by Kevin Hamilton(9/06)
... CLICK TO READ

Losing a family treasure
by Kevin Hamilton(8/30)
... CLICK TO READ

Yes, I'm a Mom
and yes, I have expectations

by Kari Collins (8/16)
... CLICK TO READ

Ask and ye shall receive,
even if you already have it

by Kevin Hamilton(8/16)
... CLICK TO READ

Summer season winding down
by Kevin Hamilton(7/26)
... CLICK TO READ

I'm no Florence Nightingale,
but still searching for a cure

by Kari Collins (7/19)
... CLICK TO READ

Kari Collins and Lady Bird Johnson:
different wildflowers

by Kevin Hamilton(7/19)
CLICK TO READ

Healing powers from Mexico
by Kari Collins (7/12)
CLICK TO READ

Weird, wacky week for Kevi
by Kevin Hamilton(7/05)
... CLICK TO READ

Girls' Guide to Fishing, III
by Kari Collins (6/21)
... CLICK TO READ

Oh, storms
by Kevin Hamilton (6/21)
... CLICK TO READ

EDITORIAL
All we need is a little patience
... CLICK TO READ

Changing the subject
by Kevin Hamilton (6/14) ... CLICK TO READ

Girls' Guide to Fishing, II
by Kari Collins (6/07) .. .CLICK TO READ

Harvest Moon
by Kevin Hamilton(6/07) .. .CLICK TO READ

Girls' Guide to Fishing
by Kari Collins (5/31) .. .CLICK TO READ

Memorial Day weekend with
fish, flags and mutant scorpions

by Kevin Hamilton (5/31) .. .CLICK TO READ

EDITORIAL
A wish list for long-range city, school plans
(5/31) .. .CLICK TO READ

Spam, fish and golf will brighten
our students' futures

by Kari Collins (5/24).. .CLICK TO READ

A few words for the IPHS Class of 2007
by Kevin Hamilton (5/24).. .CLICK TO READ

Get in your car and drive across Texas
by Kevin Hamilton (5/17).. .CLICK TO READ

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
11/22 - Pleased with Iowa Park schools ... CLICK TO READ
11/22 - Monument pin questioned ... CLICK TO READ
11/22 - Thanks for flags... CLICK TO READ
11/15 - Survey problems ... CLICK TO READ
11/15 - Problem with cafeteria... CLICK TO READ
11/08 - Concerned citizens east of Victoria St... CLICK TO READ
11/08 - Halloween costumes offensive ... CLICK TO READ
11./08 -Farabee gets high marks ... CLICK TO READ
11.08 - Not pleased with school district ... CLICK TO READ
11/01 -Students make good impression... CLIC/K TO READ

11/01 - Surveyors ... CLICK TO READ
10/25 - Disappointed mom ... CLICK TO READ
10/18 - Voice for the Hawks ... CLICK TO READ
10/04 - Christmas Lights ... CLICK TO READ
09/20 - Disappointed ... CLICK TO READ
09/06 - Keeping your tax dollars at home ... CLICK TO READ
08/16 - Thanks for support ... CLICK TO READ
06/14 - City needs street signs ... CLICK TO READ
06/14 - Enjoys the Leader ... CLICK TO READ
06/07 - Take care when discarding fish hooks ... CLICK TO READ
05/31 - Kudos for FishFest work ... CLICK TO READ
05/17 - Why I live in this town ... CLICK TO READ
05/17 - ParkFest a success... CLICK TO READ
05/17 - National Nursing Home Week... CLICK TO READ

 



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